Facts About Sex

 

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any in the world have been wrapped up with so many crazy ideas and idiosyncrasies

about the subject of sex. They have bought into the devil’s lies about the subject, gleaned from erotic literatures in the market today, X-rated movies, the internet, other social media, and even from some negative friends and acquaintances. Others still have been introduced into it by some neighbour or family relation.

Indeed, in these days of mobile handsets that are well equipped with internet facilities, it has become so easy to be wrongly and negatively influenced and lured away by this deadly weapon of the kingdom of darkness. Sex, therefore, has been engaged in as a result of lust, infatuation and love. One of these has to be the correct way to engage in the act – for there is a correct, proper and acceptable way to engage in sex.

Well, despite the above, let us not assume that we already know all we should about sex. If you do know, then let the following serve as a reminder to you. They are part of the issues I discussed with the youths that came for the Family Circle of Friends programme in August 2014. Family Circle of Friends is the brain-child and initiative of Dcns. Bimbo Victoria Agi, the wife of a one-time State Pastor of Living Faith Church, Jos, Plateau State, Nigeria. It is an organisation geared at building godly relationship or friendship in the family way.

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First and foremost, it must be understood that sex didn’t originate from the devil or from hell. God designed, initiated and ordained sex. This means that sex is a beautiful thing. It is about the only way man can multiply numerically; for when He created man, God told man to “Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth…” (Genesis 1:28, King James Version).

ü  Sex is ONLY for married couples, not for dating couples, and definitely not for teenagers or youths; so you have no business exploring as long as you are not legally married, as that would amount to premarital sex, an offence as far as God is concerned. The apostle Paul, in 1st Corinthians 7:1-3, (New Century Version), declares:

Now I will discuss the things you wrote me about. It is good for a man NOT to have sexual relations with a woman. But because sexual sin is a danger, each man SHOULD have his own wife, and each woman SHOULD have her own husband. The husband should give his wife ALL that he owes her as his wife. And the wife should give her husband ALL that she owes him as her husband (emphasis mine).

 

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Premarital sex is very like crossing the bridge before you get to it, and those who indulge in it fall into deep waters; they are not usually swimmers. The moment you begin to indulge in it, you find out that you continue to go deeper and deeper, and getting out becomes a Herculean task. Again, premarital sex is sin before God.

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When sex is performed by unmarried people, it is called fornication (1st Corinthians 6:18). When a married man or woman leaves his or her spouse and engages in it with another person who is married or not, it is called adultery. In fact, Jesus teaches that looking lustfully at a woman amounts automatically to adultery already because you have her in your heart (Matthew 5:28, 32). I totally believe the reverse is equally the same.

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There is no such thing as “I can’t seem to stop lusting after a lady (or a guy, as the case may be); I just want to be married so that I can be with my spouse and do whatever I want with her (or him) and whenever, and not keep looking outside.” This is one erroneous notion many people have. Marriage does not cure the feeling of lust. Once one has the spirit of lust, that spirit has to be dealt with, whether married or no. If not dealt with before marriage, it would definitely be carried into marriage. It is the reason why we have adultery today – a married man or woman going after another person who he or she is not married to.

ü  It is absolutely clear from Scriptures that God hates and punishes fornication and adultery. Hebrews 13:4 tells us that “…fornicators and adulterers God will judge” (New American Standard Bible).

ü  Other related names for fornication and adultery are immorality, impurity, promiscuity, lasciviousness, wantonness, lewdness, lustfulness, libidinousness, lechery, etc.

In the Old Testament, it is stated emphatically that it is wrong for a person to have sex with someone other than his or her spouse. Exodus 20:14 states simply, “Do not commit adultery”. But from the teachings of Jesus, we learn that even the thought, the desire, to have sex with someone other than your spouse is (mental) adultery and therefore sin. This would imply that if the act is wrong, then so is the intention. So even for the married, to be faithful to your spouse with your body but not your mind is to break the trust so vital to a strong marriage.

I am fully aware that this is not an easy task, even for the married. The world we live in today is so polluted that our eyes are harassed and ravaged every moment by ‘carriers of the spirit of lust’, if we may put it that way. We have half naked people walking our streets, getting into taxis with us, sometimes in our work places and these things are not regulated there and, sadly, even in the church. As such, one finds one’s self ‘struggling’ to shut the sight and thought of it all out. 

When I was to go to Ahmadu Bello University to study, I knew that it was a free world out there, where everyone cut loose from Momma’s apron strings are free to explore however they wanted. Many promising destinies get scalded in such a place, some even burnt beyond retrieval. I didn’t want mine to end up that way; therefore I prayed and asked God to help me feel absolute disgust for any half naked lady, instead of lusting after her, and He heard my prayer. The disgust grew into a frenzy that I had to stop myself one time too many from literally punching someone in the face because of their dressing!

Please note this: the Word of God does not condemn natural interest in the opposite sex; but the Word of God does condemn the deliberate and repeated filling of one’s mind with fantasies that would be outright evil if acted out, such as pre-marital sex. This is what brings about soul-tie.

I shall be talking about soul-tie and soul-mate when I come your way again next week. God bless!